Stop -
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| Collaborate and LISTEN : |
REYNARD MULDRAKE :
That... did not happen.
I know it's hard to believe, but apparently I'm terrific in the sack.
REYNARD MULDRAKE :
You made that up.
CALIBAN :
Oh... all right, you got me.
Ever since I became a human, I can't help but lie about my sex-life.
But that's the only untruthful bit in the whole story.
So please... will you kill me now?
You don't believe me, do you?
REYNARD MULDRAKE :
I thought I was going to believe you, but it's all... it's just too... fantastic.
CALIBAN :
It's not fantastic.
It's tragic!
REYNARD MULDRAKE :
No, I mean it's just... silly.
CALIBAN :
That's my life you're talking about.
REYNARD MULDRAKE :
It's my life, too.
You and me, we're the same, Guy.
We both want to believe in things that aren't real or even possible.
CALIBAN :
"There are more things in Heaven and Earth, than are dreamt of in..."
REYNARD MULDRAKE :
"...your philosophy."
I know that.
CALIBAN :
Ah, but did you know the First Folio version reads--
"than are dreamt of in our philosophy"?
REYNARD MULDRAKE :
So Hamlet is not just calling Horatio an ignorant idiot, he's calling us all ignorant idiots?
CALIBAN :
It's a comforting thought, isn't it?
Because if there's nothing more to life than what we already know, then there's nothing but... worries, self-doubt, regret and loneliness.
(sighs)
Foxman, you've got to put me out of my misery!
I don't want to wake up tomorrow and have to go to work!
What the hell's this?
You're the fuzz?
REYNARD MULDRAKE :
I'm in town investigating the murders.
CALIBAN :
And you think I'd do something like that?
What kind of a monster do you think I am?
You didn't want to help me, you just wanted to arrest me for something I didn't do.
Who takes advantage of someone like that?
A human, that's who.
Human rat fink!
I'm not delusional.
I know what I am.
I'm no monster.
You're the monster!
J'accuse Monsieur Mulder!
Run for your lives!
There's a monster!
Run!
Monster!
Monster!
(theme song ringtone playing)
REYNARD MULDRAKE :
Hey, Scully.
Hey, Mulder, where have you been?
REYNARD MULDRAKE :
I fell off the wagon, Scully.
I got a little taste of my old monster-hunting ways and then I downed the whole bottle.
DIANA LESKY :
I take it you found your were-lizard?
REYNARD MULDRAKE :
Yeah, it turns out it wasn't a man who turns into a lizard, it was a lizard who turns into a man.
DIANA LESKY :
I don't see the difference.
REYNARD MULDRAKE :
That's the point, Scully, there is no difference.
Both scenarios are equally foolish.
And I was foolish to believe... well, maybe I was just a fool, Scully.
Maybe I always have been.
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